Random Thoughts: The Boobs in Public Places Edition

1. I found Beyonce’s Super Bowl half-time show to be yawntastic. I wanted to be impressed with her talent: she’s rich, she’s gorgeous, she’s a star, she’s married to Jay-Z, and has a lovely little baby girl with a cool name.

I found nothing titillating or compelling about her half-time show. I didn’t think what she wore was terribly revealing. I didn’t think what she did with her body (call it dancing if you want) was terribly suggestive. She didn’t sing that much either, which is what I really staying in the room for.

If one of my daughters had come into the room during the half-time show, I wouldn’t have rushed to turn it off. If anything, I think I would’ve pointed out the all-female band playing behind Beyonce. That was some cool shit. Alicia Keys and Jennifer Hudson were much better performers that night, in my opinion. And Alicia Keys looked fabulous in that dress. Mm, mm, mm.

Apparently, some people found the show to be “too sexy”, and some people think that being prudish about Beyonce’s sexiness is objectifying. It could be an interesting argument, I suppose.

2. Of course while everyone fights about Beyonce’s right to be a sexy as she damn well pleases, Mt. Lebanon Library wants a photographer to take down a picture he took of a building. Because it shows an image of a partially-clothed woman (i.e. one breast is exposed). (source: Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)

My favorite thing about the angst at the Mt. Lebanon library is that’s it’s summed up with, basically, someone might make a joke about a bare breast. I’m of the mind that if they have art books, Fifty Shades of Gray, or anime, the library probably has plenty of sexytime stuff to go around. Are they seriously worried that someone’s going to protest a picture of a painted boob? REALLY?

I like Jane Pitt’s take on the whole thing. The comments are punny gold as well.

3. This morning, Kate whipped off her Batgirl nightshirt, stuck out her bony little torso, and declared, “Nipples!” Flora and I started giggling. Then we had this conversation:

“Mom, when you were little were your nipples fat?”
“Flat? Yes, everyone has flat nipples when they’re little kids.”
“No, FAT, fat nipples.”
“No. Momma has never had fat anything.”
“Now you have droopy nipples.”
“Yes. Yes I do.”

Thanks, breastfeeding!

4. And in the meantime, CBS, the network hosting the Grammy Awards on Sunday, has declared itself to be a stick in the mud vis-a-vis “excessive skin”. Snarky take on MamaPop here.

Two things: First, I am giddily excited to actually sit on my couch and watch the Grammys this year. Just about every artist I loved last year (and before) is up for some kind of award: fun., The Black Keys, Mumford & Sons, The Lumineers (great, great live show — very high energy), Alabama Shakes, and (my dirty secret) Rihanna. I’m in. I can’t wait.

Second, with the exception of Rihanna, I’m not sure I want to see excessive skin from any of those rock acts. No offense, Dan Auerbach. I’d rather just watch you play some guitar.

My guess is all this outrage about the degenerate effect that breasts in public have on the poor children is being ginned up by the GOP or the NRA. Let’s take the focus off the continuing dysfunction in Washington and the actual real danger that real guns pose to America’s youth.

Let’s flash some skin.

10 thoughts on “Random Thoughts: The Boobs in Public Places Edition

    • I have liked Rihanna since Good Girl Gone Bad.

      re: Chris Brown. I don’t understand abused women, so it’s hard for me to have any kind of opinion on the matter. There is a completely foreign psychology at work in violent relationships (which, thank heavens) I simply cannot fathom. That said, I wish people (media, whatever) would stop conflating Rihanna and Brown with what an actual abusive relationship looks like. She is rich and powerful in her own right. She has talked about her sexual issues/kinks that are not common to abusive relationships. She is very young, and again, very famous.

      I don’t let my kids listen to her music. It is *explicitly* sexual. If/when they do hear or listen to it, we’ll probably have to have lots of conversations about appropriateness, and real-life relationships.

      • I kind of have a problem with you thinking it’s NOT a real abusive relationship. If you have ever read the police report from when Chris Brown beat her up, it’s horrifying. He didn’t just slap her or something. He beat the crap out of her and KEPT beating the crap out of her then pulled over and beat on her some more. If that’s not abusive, I don’t know what it. The fact that she has money and legions of fans does NOT mean that she holds the power in her personal relationships.

        I don’t know WHAT to think about those two getting back together but about all that comes to mind is that Rhi-Rhi must think she isn’t worth very much.

  1. All this talk reminds me of Woody Allen’s old movie, “Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex, but were afraid to ask.” There’s one vignette where the countryside is being attacked by a giant boob. (Don’t ask.) The Wood-man says, “Leave it to me… I know how to handle tits.” (Droopy or otherwise.)

    Quick note about Alica Keys… To me she is far sexier than Beyonce, in just about every way. BUT I just could not get past her plastered down hairdo at the Super Bowl. Hated it!

  2. Cari, obviously I didn’t express myself well. I didn’t mean to imply that I don’t think she wasn’t abused nor that she is not in an abusive relationship. and obviously she has esteem issues if she has gone back to that dirtbag. However, she is not socially isolated, and she has the money, influence, and means to get away from the relationship. In most abusive relationships that simply isn’t true. what I am uncomfortable with is her being held up as a symbol of abused women. Not because she’s not abused but because she is not like those other women in very important ways.

    • I get where you’re coming from and I see what you mean about the differences. In the same breath, I do think she’s a symbol of abused women – because you can find them ANYWHERE. From any social standing, from any tax bracket. Domestic violence has many, many faces and there’s been plenty of people who had the means and opportunity to leave an abuser and didn’t. Does that mean we victim blame and say ‘she chose it, she deserves it?’ I don’t think so.

      I think Rhianna has deep-seated self-esteem issues and I hope she comes to her senses about the kind of relationship she’s in.

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